The Blue Horn-Rimmed Glasses

_{“I felt a sudden shock of beauty so strong}

_{that I could only stand frozen in wonder.”} 

_{Billy Baldwin}

_{One of my most vivid recollections of being "shocked by beauty", took place one autumn day in 1970. I was seven-years old, and little did I know at the time, it was going to lead to a series of events which would ultimately shift the course of my life.}

_{I sat in a high, swivel-back chair, my feet dangling, swinging back and forth, as the optometrist slipped on my first pair of glasses. They were horn-rimmed a beautiful blue and shaped just like my mother’s special “movie star” sunglasses. The ones I so loved and tried on, every chance I could get.}

_{My eyes had been growing progressively near sighted, but like most children, I didn’t know anything was wrong, and because I didn’t complain, my parents didn’t think to have them checked. The problem was not discovered until after I returned to school from summer vacation and began attending the second grade. After being told to move my desk to the first row, I still could not see the chalkboard and my teacher sent home a note, pinned to my sweater.}

_{I was so proud of my new glasses and felt so grown up. I kept touching them, over and over, feeling their cool plastic smoothness. I remember vividly, saying good bye to the doctor, taking hold of my Father’s hand, walking out the door and then…the wonder, the crystal clear wonder of it all! The clouds, the sky, the colors! The trees! No longer just swirls of green. The leaves, each individual leaf! The world was suddenly intricate, delicate and “shockingly beautiful”.}

_{Later that night; I laid in bed, one tired little girl, stubbornly resisting sleep. The glow from my Snoopy night light, cast never before noticed shadows upon the walls of my bedroom. Never before, had I seen so clearly the nubby texture of the sprayed, popcorn stucco ceiling. There was so much to see, I never wanted to close my eyes again.} 

_{My mother came and sat on the edge of the bed. She leaned down to kiss me good night and I could smell the lovely lemon fragrance of her Jean Nate After Bath Splash, and Moon Drops face cream. She reached down to take off my glasses and put them on the nightstand. “No! Please, I don’t want to take them off!” I cried. “But honey, you can’t sleep in your glasses!” She cajoled. “Why?” I continued to plead.}

_{“No one sleeps in their glasses Dolly! You might bend or break them, you wouldn’t want that now would you? You want to take care of your pretty glasses!” She explained, soothing back my hair and assuring me, that I wouldn’t be able to see anything, anyway, once the light was turned out.} Stifling a big yawn, I handed her the glasses. Once again as always, her logic was sound.

The next morning when the bell rang for school, I grabbed my lunch box and ran to line up with the other children in my class. 

“Hey, look at Duuuuh-lisa!” One of the boys cried. 

_{“Yeah, look! She’s got glasses, now she is nothing but an ugly old ‘four-eyes’!” Another one shouted.} 

_{“Four eyes! Four eyes!” They began to chant and circle around me, shoving me from one boy to the other, until the teacher opened the door. The mean-boys suddenly stopped their rough housing. They took their places in line, standing straight, as the teacher commanded, their faces a picture of mock-innocence, as we all marched into class.} 

_{I felt the hot, pink sting of embarrassment and shame as I took off my beautiful blue, horn-rimmed glasses, that were just like my Mother’s movie star sunglasses... and slid them into my desk.}

_{Later that night after dinner I went right to my room, turned the light out and sat alone in the dark. I heard a tap on my bedroom door and my teenage brother Gary who always seemed to know when I was sad, came in and sat down next to me on the floor.} 

_{“Let me turn the light on.”}

_{“No. I want to stay in the dark.” I answered firmly.} 

_{"They have been teasing you at school again haven't they? Are you crying?"}

_{I hadn't been, but now I could feel the hot tears rolling down my cheeks.}

It was bad enough that all the kids at school thought I was ugly and four-eyed.  

Bad enough, that I was bullied every day, pushed, slapped and tripped with or without the glasses. Bad enough, without my brother, my “cool” big brother knowing about it too. The other I could take in secret and never shed a tear, but this was too much.

_{I felt Gary’s arm go around my shoulder and I leaned my head against his chest. “I used to get teased about my glasses when I was a kid too.”} 

“You did?” It was hard to imagine my “cool” big brother being teased about anything.

_{“Did they call you four-eyes?” He asked protectively.}

_“Yes!”

_{"You aren't going to fall for that one are you! That is the dumbest, oldest joke in the book.  You put those glasses back on right now, and I'll show you what to do. "}Don’t you know as old as you are that nobody has the right to stop you from seeing, hearing or speaking? You need to be thankful for what you have! Just think if you were raised in the cowboy days, you wouldn’t even have any glasses at all!”  

_{(The "back in the cowboy days" reasoning worked well with me on a variety of subjects.  My brother used it often.)}

_{“Cowboys had glasses, those little gold ones.”  I reasoned.}

_{“Not if you were a real cowboy out on the range, way far away from a town, you wouldn’t have glasses! Let me teach you a few good comebacks to tell those little brats when you go to school tomorrow.  Awwwh...look what you’ve done, you’ve got my new shirt all wet, great, now it’s ruined!”} 

_{I wiped my drippy nose and smiled. He always said that when I cried on his shirt, but even there in the dark, I knew he didn’t really mean it.}

_{The next day, the school bell rang and I grabbed my lunch box. Armed with my big brother's comebacks, I walked slowly, toward the line of children.   Like Wyatt Earp heading to the OK Corral.}

_{“Hi Duuuuh-lisa!” One boy laughed “She’s so stupid, that’s why they call her Duuuuh-lisa!”} 

_{“I see you put your glasses back on, I guess she’s not only stupid but blind too!” cried another.} 

_{“What a snag!” shouted the third.} 

_{I took a deep breath, it was now or never. “Yeah, real funny Steve, that joke is about as old as your underwear!” I taunted back. There was stunned silence.}

_{“You know you are right,” I continued. “...I am four-eyed and it hurts too, because now when I look at you, you are twice as ugly!” The other kids in line began to laugh.} 

_{“You think that’s funny Duuuuh-lisa!” The third boy threatened.} 

_{“Yeah, I think it’s funny, but this Duuuuh-lisa thing is about as funny as a screen door on a submarine!”}  

_{The teacher came to the door and the boys took their places in line, glaring at me as we did our march into class. I sat down at my desk and felt the snap of a thick rubber band hit the back of my head.} 

_{“Dog!” Steve sneered. I can still in my mind's eye after all these years, his pudgy, freckled face, his extra short back to school haircut,  and red and white striped shirt.}

_{Now it was time for the big gun, the one my brother said I was to use when nothing else worked. As the teacher told us what page to find in our Busy Bee Speller, I leaned over the aisle and whispered: “Hey Steve, you know, I was told that when you were born, you were so ugly that the doctor slapped your mom!”}

_{“Did you hear what she said!” One kid snickered, and then pretty soon like a wave, the news spread from one end of the class to the other.} 

_{The battle of Prisk Elementary School, Room 19, had been fought and won.  The bullying didn't completely stop.  That would be a nice ending to the story, but it would be a lie.   I did though, wear my beautiful blue horn rimmed glasses with pride. And, I never heard anyone call me Duuuuh-lisa, ever again!}